Singing as Daily Self-care
Tap your inner performer for creative emotional outlets & a more resonant nervous system
Something really good happened for me a few weeks ago. A friend of mine - a professional trombone player - asked me if I wanted to sing in his new Bugaloo cover band. That was an easy heck yes.
I’m a performer. I did some theater in high school¹, and sang in a band called Dream Girls when I was in my early 20s (we had a 10-year reunion show last year - here’s our 2012 album 😬!), but I didn’t start leaning into this key part of me until a few summers ago when I serendipitously landed a role as Hecate, Greek goddess of birth, the moon, transitions, and the underworld. I was afraid to be seen, I guess. That’s normal. I still have that fear a little bit, but it’s much more melty and pliable than before.
Yours truly as Hecate in Fiona Criddle’s The Flower Debt
Maybe it’s because since giving birth², I’ve been telling myself, “I gave birth. I can do anything,” in hard moments. Maybe it’s because I’ve been able to take Dolly Parton’s wise words about going on stage, “What are they gonna do, eat me?” to heart. Maybe it’s because I feel so well-supported by my friends and family, my husband James who, when I get cranky and don’t have a performance coming up, asks, “When’s your next performance?” A very gentle way of saying, Your stuff is coming out sideways at home. Get something on the books so you have an externalized creative outlet!
In any case, I’ve learned how important it is for me to do my near-daily song-and-dance in the kitchen. Goldie, almost 3, is really getting into singing and dancing, which makes my heart soar. Singing from my pelvic floor (a decade of kundalini yoga has sensitized my pelvic floor and lung awareness!) while relaxing my throat and feeling into the lyrics of whatever track I’m hyperfocusing on in a given week…that’s really, really important self-care. Especially because the biofeedback is so effective. I feel a lot, and intensely, and the more (fun) ways I have of processing my feelings, the freer I am in my mind, body, and nervous system.
It’s also fun to share my recording with you. I saw Beautiful, the Carole King musical last week and it’s been TAPESTRY all day in my house/car. Is it vulnerable to share? Yes, a little. But I really must share! Because what if it gets you singing again? Or helps you connect the dots between singing and feeling good, and leads you to sing more? What if you read this and start choreographing in your kitchen? Please send videos if you do.
The worst that happens is you don’t watch, and the best that happens is that you get reminded of how good it feels - on so many levels - to sing. Maybe you’re averse to the sound of your voice. Maybe you can’t get enough of it! Either way, please do sing. Sing often, in whatever environment you feel most comfortable in.
Why?
Because singing stewards energy through our bodies. Energy that, left untouched, remains undigested, leaving us feeling stuck or coming out sideways at our people and even strangers. When we sing our emotions, we increase coherence between our minds and our bodies. We become more aligned.
Singing is good for us. When you use your vocal chords, you stimulate the vagus nerve, sending ‘rest & digest’ signals to your body, inviting a felt sense of relaxation. In band practice last Sunday, we practiced a bit of harmony and oh my goodness the pure sacredness of that sound…what a gift!
If you want support working with your voice (singing also opens vishuddha, the throat chakra, helping us to speak our truth more easily and clearly), I recommend checking out this 10-minute vocal warmup from the darling and VERY supportive Cheryl Porter. Goldie calls it mee-may-ma-moo…she’s a big fan, too.
Do you sing? Why do you sing? What are your go-to songs? Share in the comments! 🪩🪩🪩
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I sang just fine, but could NOT learn choreography for musical auditions quickly enough, so I just made it up. I got points for creativity…not a role in the show. Wildly improvising dance steps to West Side Story’s Mambo! was a formative moment, though. I stepped outside the box on impulse and it didn’t kill me, leading me to take more on-stage chances.
0 out of 10 stars do not recommend. Thank goddess each birth is different!
